Separation or divorce is difficult for any family, but one of the most pressing concerns for many fathers is what happens to their relationship with their children. Will you get to see them? Do you have any say in their upbringing? In this blog, our Mediator and Family Law Solicitor, Sarah French, answers some of the most commonly asked questions around fathers’ custody rights in the UK. She explains the legal position of fathers, how custody is decided, and what steps you can take if you’re struggling to agree on arrangements.
What are a father’s custody rights in the UK?
The law in England and Wales does not give automatic preference to either parent. Instead, the focus is firmly on the welfare of the child.
Most fathers now share parental responsibility – a legal term which means having equal rights and responsibilities when making important decisions about the child’s life, such as education, medical care, religion, and name changes.
Unless there are safeguarding concerns, the court will always try to ensure that children maintain a meaningful relationship with both parents. Shared care does not necessarily mean a 50/50 split, but it does mean that fathers have just as much right to be involved in their child’s upbringing.
Can a dad get full custody in the UK?
Yes, in certain circumstances, a father can be granted full custody (legally known as a live with order). However, this depends entirely on what is in the best interests of the child.
Full custody may be appropriate if, for example:
- The mother is unable to care for the child due to illness or other reasons;
- There are concerns about neglect, abuse, or domestic violence;
- The child has expressed a clear and consistent wish to live with their father.
In most cases, however, the court encourages shared care unless it is not in the child’s best interests.
How to get custody rights as a father
If you share parental responsibility, you already have legal standing in decisions about your child. But if you’re struggling to agree on arrangements with your ex-partner, there are several options:
1. Parenting plans and informal agreements
Some parents reach an agreement directly, often referred to as the “kitchen table” approach. With careful consideration in relation to the location of the meeting – perhaps a walking route in a public space – this approach can create an informal setting that facilitates open communication while remaining respectful. The child’s needs should always come first, and it’s helpful to keep a written record of what’s agreed stored in a safe, private space.
2. Family mediation
If direct discussions prove difficult, family mediation offers a structured environment for resolving issues. At Scott Bailey, each of our Family Law solicitors is a trained mediator and can facilitate productive conversations that help parents focus on solutions. Mediation is generally much quicker and more cost-effective than going to court, and can be conducted in person or via video call. We also offer seperate breakout rooms during mediation if needed.
Government vouchers may be available to help cover the cost where children are involved, and we can advise you on this if you’d like to find out more.
3. Collaborative law
In a collaborative process, each parent instructs a specially trained lawyer, and all parties meet together to resolve issues without going to court. This approach promotes transparency, reduces conflict, and can include the support of family consultants, financial advisers, or both.
4. Co-parenting support
Some parents benefit from working with a co-parenting coach or appointing a parenting coordinator to help manage day-to-day matters and communication. This is especially useful after a parenting plan or court order is in place, as it provides a mechanism to resolve minor disputes without the need to return to court.
What if we still can’t agree?
When all else fails, a court or arbitrator can step in.
- A “Child Arrangements Order” sets out where the child will live and how much time they’ll spend with each parent.
- A “Specific Issue Order” or “Prohibited Steps Order” may be needed to resolve particular points of disagreement (e.g. choice of school or medical treatment).
- Alternatively, parents can appoint a family law arbitrator – a private judge who can make a binding decision outside of court.
Although the court is always a last resort, it provides a structured outcome when parents are unable to agree, and our family law solicitors are highly experienced in protecting their clients’ best interests in the courtroom.
The shift in the law: from parental rights to parental responsibility
Historically, children were viewed almost as the property of their fathers, with little legal recognition of their rights. That changed significantly with the Children Act 1989, which introduced the concept of “parental responsibility” and made the welfare of the child the court’s paramount consideration.
Fathers no longer need to ‘fight for their rights’. The law no longer considers parental rights in isolation – it considers what is best for the child.
Get legal advice early
Every family situation is different, and early legal advice can help you understand your options and avoid unnecessary conflict.
At Scott Bailey LLP, our experienced family law solicitors regularly advise parents on child arrangements, including mediation, court applications, and enforcement of orders.
Whether you’re seeking to protect your time with your child or need guidance on your parental responsibilities, we’re here to help.
